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Below you will find a concise summary of our conversation with Veerle Dobbelaere. The full episode can be listened to via Spotify, SoundCloud & Apple Podcasts.
About Veerle Dobbelaere
We probably don’t need to introduce Veerle Dobbelaere to you anymore, as most of us know her as an actress in many films, series, and theater productions.
But besides her work as an actress, Veerle is also active as a professional certified mental coach, because she is fascinated by how people work. She wants to touch and move people, both as an actress and as a mental coach.
With her Ademruimte Academy and the accompanying book ‘Ademruimte, how different breathing can improve your life,’ she wants to teach people, among other things, the power of breathing.
Why mental coaching?
Human behavior is just the tip of the iceberg. Beneath the surface lie our drives, beliefs, values, ... which are shaped by our culture, upbringing, society, and the people we encounter in life.
Most people want to achieve a feeling of happiness and show certain behavior to reach that.
But unfortunately, for many, the outcome is not as desired and they don’t feel good at all. Their behavior does not give them the feeling they are looking for, and then having a mental coach can be useful. A mental coach helps to look beneath the surface, to slow down and learn to pause at thoughts and behaviors. Mental coaching can help recognize and address limiting beliefs with insights and slowing down.
Mental health in the workplace
Mental coaching can also be very helpful at work. Many managers struggle with handling conflicts, dealing with boundaries and setting limits, ... But often they also question what leadership really means to them.
In teams at work, there are also things above and below the surface, things that can sometimes hinder smooth teamwork.
A mental coach can guide a team to put on the table what is difficult and learn to give and receive feedback.
Because feedback is a powerful tool, which unfortunately we still too often experience as criticism. Well-delivered feedback is necessary to grow, but that doesn’t work if you see feedback as an attack.
That’s why coaching can help teams learn to communicate with each other, even about difficult topics, to strengthen the connection even more.
Connection to the next level
How can people still find connection in these challenging times we currently live in? How can we connect with colleagues, team members, ... despite the distance? By continuing to look for what is possible within everything that isn’t.
Use the fantastic tool that distinguishes us as humans from other species, namely our imagination!
When our brains imagine something, for example, if you close your eyes and think you are walking on a sunny beach, it feels just as real as if we were really there. Our brains do not distinguish between our projections and what is real. If you are aware of this, you can use it to create a reality you want now – not to escape reality. This can definitely give a mental boost if you are feeling overwhelmed or tired of all the digital meetings.
Living in the here and now
Our thoughts guide our behavior and you can learn to steer your brain. Creating your own happiness is something you can learn!
Living in the now plays an important role in this. Constantly thinking about what happened yesterday or ten years ago or what might happen tomorrow is a total waste of your energy.
Living in the now does not mean denying things that are bad, but simply living realistically in the present.
Mindfulness or meditation is a first step in a process of awareness because you cannot become aware if you don’t first slow down and pause. It is therefore not a goal, but a good tool for awareness.
JustBite also wants to create awareness around healthy eating and healthy breaks. By offering healthy snacks and letting people experience healthy food. If you want to get the most out of a snack and snack mindfully, eat very consciously and engage all your senses.
Take a moment to consciously experience what you eat, what you taste, what you smell. Claim your break moment to disconnect briefly and reconnect with yourself.
Breathe in, breathe out
Currently, we are all under a lot of stress caused by our thoughts. Our autonomic nervous system puts us in fight, flight, or freeze mode because of our thoughts. But this only becomes a problem if it happens constantly, because then it is chronic stress, resulting in our body becoming completely out of balance.
Reprogramming your thoughts is a long-term effort and requires a lot of practice, but there is an instant hack when you are under stress, and that is our breathing. Even if you can’t control your thoughts, you can immediately calm your system by starting to breathe differently. Body and mind are inseparably connected. When our mind is stressed, our body reacts, but also vice versa. When we breathe more calmly and exhale longer, our mind will automatically calm down as well.
Breathing is truly a superpower that can immediately bring calm to your system.
How can you maintain breathing exercises and prevent your thoughts from wandering all the time?
To begin with, it is a misconception to think that meditating means having no thoughts. Our brain simply produces thoughts; that is also the purpose of our mind!
What mindfulness teaches us is to create some space between your thoughts and yourself, to realize that thoughts are just a product of our brain.
Important to realize:
- you are not your thoughts
- you produce your thoughts and you can be in control of your thoughts
Conclusion
It is not the moment you slow down and sit that is important, but the entire awareness process.
See it as a kind of mental hygiene to take a moment every day to become aware. It’s not about trying to switch off thoughts but about creating enough space between your thoughts and yourself. You can choose to do something with a thought or not, and that is a matter of training. Even if you start with just 1 minute a day, that is better than not starting. You can gradually build up.
Discover Veerle’s Ademruimte Academy